"As if to Part the Sky...": Poetry and Ponderings from the Blue Ridge Mountains
On Love, Wonder, and Parenthood
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Hello, friends.
I pray these lines find you well. In case you didn’t know, we are tucked away in the Blue Ridge Mountains for family vacation this week, and the poetry is flowing (even though my health has been a challenge).
Last night, I had the most precious conversation with my daughter about the Universe and how it is actively expanding.1 We were reading through a new book I gifted her and our nephew.2 To say that she is in awe is an understatement, and like any parent, I love watching her eyes light up as her thoughts whirl about. There’s a beautiful energy in her childlike wonder that I can’t get enough of.
For my daughter, her wonder turns intensely curious and focused when it’s about a new subject. So, needless to say, she has had exactly 1,592 questions for me each time we read her Universe book together. As a longtime teacher turned professor, I love answering her questions. She’s my most important student, so I use our time to teach her whatever I might know. In this case, I am trying to teach her the importance of science and God’s divine design. I just taught her about Intelligent Design (ID) and fine-tuning, and she was enrapt.3
So, back to the poetry that’s flowing. As I was saying, we had the most precious conversation when I was tucking my daughter into bed last night, and it was something I never want to forget, so I had to write it down as soon as I could.
Of course, it came out as a poem about the Universe. But it’s really about love and God’s active hand in it all. I named it “As if to Part the Sky.” My daughter wants me to name it “Heartbeats and Stars.” What do you think?
I hope you might find something here:
AS IF TO PART THE SKY by Kimberly Phinney "The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands."--Psalm 19:1 It’s bedtime, and we are talking about the Universe— among other things. And she says to me, “Mommy, is it true it’s as big as they say it is?” “Oh yes, my love,” I tell her. “God is still making things as we speak. They even say the Universe is actively expanding— a lot like Love does…" We pause, and I say, "Don’t you think it’s grand that God is still creating?” She nods, as I take my open hand and gently pitter-patter on my daughter’s heart: "Buh-bump, buh-bump. Buh-bump, buh-bump." Then looking up, in our grand imagination through our cabin ceiling, we think we see the Heavens open up to us. And from her heart, I lift my flickering fingers and glide them through the air, as if to part the sky. She looks at me in awe— then in sweet anticipation. And I say this: “Every time your heart beats— buh-bump, buh-bump, buh-bump, buh-bump, you’ll know, my love, that God is still making stars.” Her eyes alight in wonder, as she asks me one last question: “Mommy, can we do it again?” And I say, “Buh-bump, buh-bump, Buh-bump, buh-bump.” And she says, "I think I see new stars..."
“GOD IS STILL MAKING STARS…”
It’s moments like these—simple, gentle, quiet, unseen—that are truly miraculous. Our children are gifts. They give us back the eyes to see what we have long forgotten. They remind us, without any effort at all, what truly matters. In so many ways, I have been reborn through my daughter.
And to think, I almost didn’t get to have her (after more than a decade of infertility and pregnancy loss). There is never a time that I don’t see a miracle looking back at me. I pray I always remember what God has done by allowing me—the most unlikely and hopeless of all—to become a mother to my one and only little girl.
I pray that wherever you find yourself in relation to the parenthood journey (with or without, waiting or longing, raising or releasing, pregnant or adopting, loving or losing) that you can look up at the Heavens and know that God is still making stars. He’s still moving, still creating, and still loving you right where you are. Whether the journey turns out the way you had desperately hoped for or not, God’s working hands are big enough to hold all of you—be it grief, joy, overwhelm, or regret. He will fill your life with stars—no matter what. I know this is true because I have walked deep, dark valleys of searing loss that were only redeemed by his starlit path.
He wants to part the sky for you—just so you can see his Love a little more. It’s the Love that keeps us going when grief becomes too much. It’s the Love that makes the hard into something holy, and it’s the only way through.
So, tonight, as I type these last lines, I hope you might go out and look at the stars and imagine all the ways that God is still working, moving, and creating stars.
You belong here,
me
AND BEFORE I GO…
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My hand is up for "Heartbeats and Stars" :)
“There is never a time that I don’t see a MIRACLE looking back at me.” In the poetry of brown eyes…there is my own miracle. Thank you for reminding me.